In my last blog I spoke about being busy. That might have been a bit of an exaggeration. I was busy being worn out and feeling a bit queasy and just a tad under the weather. And is it coincidence that my chemo was this week? I think not!
This time around Andy wasn't here to share the joy. He is off to Europe as is his custom after filing season. And before anyone starts making big eyes and saying anything about his leaving in my "time of need" let me assure you, I pushed him out of the nest. I look forward to my two weeks of bachelorette time at least as much as Andy looks forward to his travel. And who knows what he might bring me back as a present? Oh, gee, I am such a material girl. Sigh!
While he is gone, Sonia graciously agreed to come stay with me. She is "lucky" that as a freelance editor, she can pretty much do her job wherever she is. As long as there is a table, two computers and a floor for her to work on. And fortunately for her there is also a cat to shred her work when she isn't looking.
Sonia arrived the day Andy left and the next day was chemo. She hasn't driven in a number of years (who needs a car in Chicago?). Fortunately, my rebbetzin, Shternie, had already offered to drive me to and from Kaiser on chemo day so we were good to go. We had coffee beforehand and Sonia and Shternie did some catching up. Chemo was the same as always. Saw some of the same patients. And met a person who is in the same clinical trial as I am only she is getting the Avistad. I tried very hard not to be jealous. She did kind of lord it over me a bit though. Hmmm, maybe that isn't true. I think I am just being resentful now. Whatever. I know I am getting good care. Because of the drop in white blood cell count the first time around I will have Neupogen injections for seven days following each chemo treatment. And guess what? Sonia offered, OFFERED (!) to give them to me. How can she be so cool about it when her parents are such wimps? Sometimes (luckily) the apple does fall a bit distant from the tree. Thursday morning she was up bright and early, reading the instructions, preparing the injection and then without a squeal or shriek, she plunged the needle into my abdomen and administered the shot! I was totally impressed. And inspired. And my neighbors, when they heard about it, sent over their congratulations. That she is able to do what her parents can't astonishes us all. However, once again, my competitive spirit started to rear its head. And after Sonia did it two mornings in a row, I got up extra early Saturday and decided I would "prepare" the injection equipment so we could get it done quickly, once she got up. I swabbed my abdomen in a new spot, took the plastic cap off the tiny vial, retracted the needle so air was pulled into the needle, plunged the needle into the vial and injected the vial with air. The needle and vial were then inverted so the vial was upside down. Now all that was left was to pull the Neupogen into the needle, get rid of the air bubbles and give myself the injection. Could I do it? Well, dear Reader, I could and I did! I amazed myself! Within a minute or so of giving myself the injection, Sonia came downstairs. When I told her what I had done she indicated that she was really proud of me. I felt very competent!
I figured that would be the hardest part of my chemo this time but once again I learn my lesson. Even though everything was pretty much the same, everything is also different. I guess my body is slowly being beaten down by all these chemicals and so it is a little harder and longer to bounce back. I am not having such severe digestive problems this time but it still seems like time stands still in my tummy. And this time, for the first time, I did feel a little queasy. Not real nausea, just that feeling you get when you know you are going to feel nauseated but haven't gotten there yet. It wasn't bad enough for me to take the compazine but bad enough that my appetite was off. And yet, I did my best to eat and drink. I am very good about getting the minimum of 2 to 3 quarts of liquid a day that I am required to drink to keep myself healthy during chemo. Between straight water, a smoothie, tisanes, soups and yogurt (anything that has liquid in it or can melt to liquid counts), I more than fill that requirement. I have one half caff latte a day but because there is some caffeine in it, it doesn't count. But one must have one's coffee, don't you know?
I've been reading a lot lately between sleeping and eating. Read another Daniel Silva and another two Maisie Dobbs. I am enjoying them so much. I like following a character that develops and grows. I love the settings of the Daniel Silva books. They take place in cities all over Europe. And the Maisie Dobbs setting is in mainly in London England and sometimes France between WWI and WWII. Lots of social commentary and historical context. I find them fascinating. Of course, the two series couldn't be more different. Silva's books are about an Israeli secret agent/assassin (he is the good guy) with lots of blood and gore. Maisie Dobbs is a sweet former war nurse who was brought up in a lower class household but goes into service as she enters her teens and is elevated to middle class when her employers discover she has a brain. Of course, it isn't that simple. And it is totally charming.
Life is very uncomplicated for me right now. Eat, sleep, go to Kaiser when the time is right and get those walks in. Nothing else is mandatory. I'm so relaxed it is practically sinful. I'll enjoy it while I can.